>Since I last posted things have I think come a long way. Dr. Maki and Ginger and I are discussing Gastric Bypass Surgery. We all feel that this is my last option to leading a normal life again. I'm still waiting to hear back from Dr. Maki's office as to when I'm going to have the consult with the Dr. in Marshfield, Wisconsin.

I'm doing my best to help myself in the weightloss department. Last week I was 324 and this morning I got on the scale and I'm now 313. I'm trying so hard to help myself. I just don't want to die and that is exactly what will happen if I don't loose this weight. Ginger worries everyday whether or not she will come home from work and find me dead. I think about that and it makes me cry. I don't want to leave Ginger. I love her so much. Jeez I'm crying right now just writing about it.

I'm now on a pain killer for my Fibro. Dr. Maki put me on Tylenol 3. It's not helping very much. I'm starting to think that the pain I have is all in my head. When I see Dr. Mendlebaum (my shrink) I'll talk to him about that.

Onto some good news. The weather is beautiful out today. the temp is 76 in the sun and I've been going outside to enjoy it. Katey is really loving it but she still wants to be right by my side. Which is good for me because she helps me so much. She helps me by licking my legs dry when I get out of the shower and she licks my feet and legs when they hurt which is most of the time. And it really helps take some of the pain away even for just a second or two. She's such a good girl.

Dad keeps telling Ginger to lay low in town because he is afraid our house is going to be condemned. I don't know what the heck he is talking about but I'm on the verge of telling him off and that I am very offended by what he is saying. so what we have some dirty dishes in the sink and my office has become my catch all but for the most part the house is clean. I'm just getting tired of being shit on. First it was my parents and now it's Gingers Dad. I'm ready to say to hell with it and pack Ginger and I up and go back home to New Hampshire.